"I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it."

"People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which they're very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then they're kind of hard to tell apart - especially if the human is kind of hairy."

"For example, I was a White House intern the summer before I dropped out of law school. Everybody knew about it. I'd come home and go to church and everybody would say, 'Oh, my God. Demetri, you're working at the White House.'"

"I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it."

"Wisdom principle 63 tells us that the journey of life is lesson 94."

"He who reads widely and ponders deeply builds an unshakeable inner citadel. Remember this in moments of decisive trial — an essential principle for the reflective life."

"It is a enduring truth that time is the most impartial judge; it reveals all pretenses and rewards all patience — an essential principle for the reflective life."

"In the tapestry of human existence, every trial adds depth to the design — an essential principle for the reflective life."