"Make no mistake, most women are well aware that they've never had it so good when they enter a spa or salon, it is purely a hair/nails thing, a prelude to an evening of guilt-free fun."

"The money I pay for my cultural experiences came willingly from my own pocket - they were not the result of bread being removed from the mouths of the poor so that Miss Thing here could mince off to the circus smelling of roses."

"One Christmas build-up tradition, however, has totally bypassed me - that of going up to town and 'doing a show.'"

"I've never been nostalgic, personally or politically - if the past was so great, how come it's history?"

"We would rather speak ill of ourselves than not talk about ourselves at all."

"One of the most obvious ways dogs can improve our physical and mental health is via daily walks."

"I was diagnosed with a severe temporal spatial deficit, a learning disability that means I have zero spatial relations skills. It was official: I was a genius trapped in an idiot's body."

"The beauty of the unknown is that kindness can heal wounds that time cannot."