"If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead."

"I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes."

"It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else."

"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

"What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult."

"A family with the wrong members in control that, perhaps, is as near as one can come to describing England in a phrase."

"As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula."

"I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other."