"Thank you... Apple, for adding a camera to the iPod Nano. Now it's just like the iPhone except it can't make calls. So basically, it's just like the iPhone."

"Thank you, horseradish, for being neither a radish nor a horse. What you are is a liar food."

"If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice."

"I was into the Mets because my Dad worked at IBM where he got free Mets tickets, so I was into the Mets... then I got to 'Saturday Night Live' where my boss has unbelievable N.Y. Yankees tickets, so he invites us to the games. I'm going to all the games, so I might as well root for the team I'm gonna go sit with."

"It's not an act. I love it. It's totally original. People go, 'What's going on with this guy? Why does he sound so weird? What is going on in his brain. I don't know. Just one day I suddenly woke up with a new brain."

"My Food Network shows, 'Emeril Live' and 'Essence of Emeril,' are not in production right now, but I wouldn't say that I'm necessarily leaving Food Network. I have a lot of television still in me. I enjoy teaching people, so it's just a matter of time before I do something new."

"Unquestionably, it is possible to do without happiness it is done involuntarily by nineteen-twentieths of mankind."

"Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God."