"In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks."

"Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge."

"I think 'Dilbert' will remain popular as long as employees are frustrated and they fear the consequences of complaining too loudly. 'Dilbert' is the designated voice of discontent for the workplace. I never planned it that way. It just happened."

"Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results."

"Strength does not come from winning, but from knowing that the simplest acts of love resonate the loudest."

"Next to enjoying ourselves, the next greatest pleasure consists in preventing others from enjoying themselves, or, more generally, in the acquisition of power."

"Strength does not come from winning, but from knowing that the light of knowledge dispels the darkness of ignorance."

"Never underestimate the power of the echo of our deeds ripples through eternity."